The Love of My Life

I would like to thank all of the beautiful angels that have surrounded me throughout this challenging time. I thank you for the many acts of kindnesses you have performed for David and Me – some I knew about and there were some I'm sure I didn't know about. I thank you.

Many of you may know that David could be a rather quiet man, while others saw him as exhibiting a dry sense of humor and still others saw him standing head to head while enthusiastically discussing current events; but did you know he loved old television programming like The Three Stooges, other slap stick comedy routines and The Lawrence Welk Show, yes, The Lawrence Welk Show.

Did you know that David kept special occasion cards that were sent to him including the ones I mailed him? I didn't either until I found them in some of his things. I remember when he opened his mail and found a card I had sent him, there was always a quiet reserve and an even quieter thank you. Yet, here was the proof of what those cards meant to him.

You may have known David was an engineer but did you know he helped design the propulsion system for the Triad Submarine and got to ride in one that he helped build?

David loved to learn. He had a master's degree in both engineering and language from the University of Kentucky. At the age of 50, he took classes in A/C & Amp, Heating, Electricity and others. He not only loved to learn but loved to share his knowledge whenever possible.

David was many things to many different people, but I want you to get to know him through my eyes – the David I fell in love with. My David died skydiving – no… he didn't actually skydive but rather, he lived and yes, died without doubting that wherever he landed, he would make sure the landing was a smooth one for him and especially for me.

David was a very private person. He had to be. He worked for decades as a government contractor and knew that discretion concerning his private life was key to his professional career's success. He fought for justice, not by waving flags or demonstrating on a street corner – he left that part to me – but rather, David did it quietly amidst the undercurrents of life. I remember he once helped an individual by keeping in contact for months because they shared similar medical challenges. He kept an old sewing machine, not because he still sewed, but because whenever he saw it, it brought back many loving memories of his mom and the times they spent sewing together.

David was a very compartmentalized man. I am not. I was right out there, and he was not. Yet, our relationship represented the yin and the yang; we were total opposite forces coming together and interconnecting – something that gave us both balance. Most importantly, sharing that interconnection became a solid foundation for embracing each other's differences and in many cases, celebrating them. We never asked or expected one or the other to change the essence of who we were. When asked, "What was the one thing you loved the most about David?" I couldn't answer it because it was all the little things, the little gestures that made up the whole man that I fell in love with.

When we first moved to On Top of the World, we weren't sure it was the best move for us. It was. David had dropped us into a neighborhood that became family. It was David that suggested and later organized the first neighborhood barbecue. We participated in the newly organized LBGTQ club. Through it all we felt safe to just be ourselves.

In fact, I want to recognize someone here today that was an integral part of opening social doors for us here – doors that led to lasting friendships and a real sense of community, our cruise director: Barbara Grimshaw.

Please stand-up Barb. Thank you for all you have done for us. I know David loved you and I will never forget what a wonderful friend you have been to both of us.

I also want to honor the members of our respective families by blood and by choice. They couldn't be here, not because they didn't want to – they did. In fact, in the near future, David's ashes will be transported to Louisville, KY where we will hold a separate ceremony. He will be laid to rest next to his mom, dad, and older brother.

David was a multi-faceted man and had a depth to him that I spent 40 years getting to know. His demonstration of love and loyalty to me and his friends and family was strong to the end.

I remember asking David several times what kind of service he wanted after his passing. He said, "You know what, I'm dead –you deal with it." That trust in me was total, knowing I would do right by him, our relationship, our family, and our friends.

I often told David and others close to us that I was the lucky one. That statement was never closer to the truth than when I got to experience our last dance, our last social outing with friends, and at the very end I got a chance to experience our last kiss and a chance to say goodbye.

I will always love you David.